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Here's me when I was fun. I used to play beer pong.

I am giving up alcohol for Lent.

When I announced this, Husband said “So, now you are Buddhist, Hindu AND Catholic?

This is embarrassing, but I never really thought about Lent being Catholic. Growing up, the only person I knew who participated in Lent was my atheist friend, Heather. Every year, she would steadfastly give up cereal; I thought it was something people just did.

But, I’ll be honest, the whole Lent thing is just a ruse, a cover for wanting to cut alcohol from my life.

I don’t drink much but on a weekend I might have wine or a girly cocktail. However, these days, even one drink makes me feel like a hot mess. I don’t sleep well, I’m dehydrated, nauseated and cranky for the whole next day. So, now I have a good excuse for not drinking; I’m doing it for God.

But here’s the thing I’ve been struggling with since starting serious yoga a few years ago.

I feel like I’m not fun anymore.

  • I don’t drink alcohol
  • I do drink green juice
  • I don’t eat junk food
  • I do eat things like kale and quinoa
  • I like to get enough sleep
  • I get up early to practice yoga and meditate
  • I have healthier and less drama-infused relationships

In short, I’m not fun.

It’s not like I even want to do the long lost “fun” things; I no longer have the desire to participate in them.

Yes, of course my life is fun now, but it’s a decidedly different kind of fun. I have healthy fun. Is that a thing? Doesn’t fun inherently have to be dangerous and unwholesome?

I am slowly getting more comfortable with my new version of fun and hanging with other yogis (or just other dorks) who don’t roll their eyes at my clean living is very helpful. But every once in a while, I long for the days when drinking and eating junk and getting in a stupid fight felt good.

But then I go drink a juice, meditate for a while and go do yoga with Husband. And you know what? For my money, that’s a hell of a Friday night.

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