Changing the construction

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acceptance, change your mind, judgement, life choices, life lessons, meditation, yoga studio

Why doesn’t yoga always feel this peaceful?

Last year, our yoga studio moved to a new location. It’s in a shiny new building with nice bathrooms and freshly painted walls with no fingerprints on them…

…and it’s also got construction.

Lots of construction.

The space above us is being renovated, so there are drills and hammers and all kinds of loud things I can’t even identify. Sometimes I suspect they are doing shot-put with bowling balls for the hell of it. The yoga studio walls shake in savasana. It’s not ideal.

So, I sigh loudly. And I cringe. And I think This studio is my happy place where I come to finally get quiet and de-stress and why isn’t it all calm like doing yoga on a peaceful beach and DEAR GOD WHY???

The other day, one of my yoga teachers – who, not coincidentally, is one of the most enlightened people I know – commented on the construction. She said it made her crazy for a little while, but she just thought about the person who was on the other side of that drill on this Saturday morning. She sent out a little love and gratitude to them for doing their job, so that she didn’t have to work construction and she could be down here, teaching yoga.

Holy shift, Batman.

I was instantly dragged out of my own whiney issues and with such beautiful simplicity, the situation morphed into something positive. It was an opportunity to practice sending some compassion to another being that I don’t even know.

You know what’s really crazy? I don’t even hear the construction anymore. It was like flipping a switch in my mind. And when someone mentioned that the construction was going to be continuing for the next 6 months – I though, well, that’s not too bad.

Because really? In the grand scope of things, what is 6 months?

A mindful, open-hearted comment like that can cause such a shift in perspective. Instead of getting cranky about the construction and therefore ruining my own yoga practice, I can choose a different choice.

Of course, as with everything with yoga, this has been working beyond the mat, too. Instead of rolling my eyes when the lady in front of me at the grocery store wants to fight about the sale price of pretzels – I can change my mind and just be present and feel my feet on the floor. When I have to get blood drawn for my annual check up, I can change my mind and do some deep breathing instead of tensing up my entire body, and almost passing out for lack of oxygen.

Every moment is a choice and you are always allowed to change your mind. It’s shocking to see how often my initial instinct is to make something harder than it needs to be. So much of life is completely out of my control, it makes sense that I should at least choose to make my responses a little more pleasant. It is clear from experience that sending out bitchy, negative energy to a difficult situation is only going to make it worse. For everyone.

The construction is going to be there, whether I am ruining my yoga practice over it or not.

Not seems like a way better choice.

————–

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Valentine’s Day: yogi style

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Valentine's Day

Valentine’s day is here, in all its cloying, grasping, cheesy-plastic-hearts glory.

This is a holiday that seems to cause a lot of anxiety. People who are not in a relationship feel pressure to be coupled. People who are in a relationship feel pressure for theirs to look like something out of a romantic comedy.

What a mess.

Valentine’s day has good intentions; the celebration of love is a beautiful thing. I remember back to grade school when Valentine’s day was about those flimsy paper cards and everybody got one, regardless of their popularity. That tradition seems so much more authentic to the spirit of the day than the grown-up version.

Now, February 14th seems to be about expensive dinners, flowers that immediately start wilting and stressed out people striving for an impossible ideal.

Anything with that much pressure is bound to explode.

Does that make me sound unromantic? Maybe I am unromantic in the traditional sense, because the romance of movies makes me roll my eyes.

I love real romance. I love the connection that comes from being deeply understood and accepted. That just doesn’t happen to come in a heart-shaped box.

Whether you are in a romantic relationship or not, let’s de-clutter some of the extraneous garbage from our friend St. Valentine. Let’s simply celebrate love. Tell someone that you are crazy about them. Tell your partner, your hairdresser, your friend or your cat.

Tell them that you smile when they walk in the room and that you feel safe enough to cry in front of them. Tell them that they matter. Tell them that their soul is unique and valued and they make your world a better place. Tell them that they are perfectly imperfect and they never have to change to be worthy of your adoration.

Write it on a post-it note or leave it on a voicemail or tell them over a cup of coffee in the morning. Just make sure you tell them.

So, maybe I am a bit of a romantic mush. I love love, in all it’s forms. I just don’t think it needs to come with a prix-fix menu.

And that’s why my Valentine’s Day will not involve candy or blood diamond jewelry. It will be about connection, gratitude and being in the present moment. I’ll be spending the evening getting all hot and sweaty with Husband – in our Bikram yoga hot room.

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