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I was in the bathroom after class, pressing my face and body against the cool metal wall of the stall – wishing I would just throw up and then die and get it over with.
That is my most vivid memory of my first Bikram class.
I always love hearing about people’s first experiences with Bikram. It’s like hearing about how a couple first met. Some people take to it immediately. Others not-so-much. I was a not-so-much person.
I don’t like extreme things. I don’t respond to tough love. I hate the heat, I hate saunas, I hate sweat.
On the surface, there is no reason I should love Bikram.
But I do. A lot.
However, the early part of our relationship was rocky.
When I walked in to the hot room for the first time, I remember thinking that I couldn’t spend five minutes in a room that hot. This was ridiculous. This had to be dangerous.
I sat out many, many postures. Can’t remember how many because I think I was blacking out.
Halfway through, I noticed that I couldn’t hear anything. The teacher was talking like one of those teachers from Charlie Brown, all I heard was blood rushing through my ears. Trying to figure out my left from my right felt like deciphering the Rosetta Stone. Lying on my back felt like running a marathon.
When class ended, I wanted to cry the way you do when you realize things might be alright after all. I had survived.
I walked out of the studio and decided Bikram yoga people were all nuts; like the people who get a kick out of doing those army-like obstacle courses, covered in slimy mud.
But on the Bikram yoga studio website it said you should do three classes before you judge. Being an avid rule follower, I dragged my still-aching body back to the studio three days later. The second class was a little better and the third class felt like an IV of joy pumped directly into my soul.
I was hooked.
Three years later, that studio feels like second home. It is the place where I get amazing support. It is the place where I detox, renew and connect.
It’s where I go to feel better, to heal my stiff body, clear my wandering mind and calm my anxious heart. Yes, it’s still a place where I work hard, but not so hard that I disconnect. I work so hard that I finally feel everything and I finally stop running away from life.
So, it’s a good reminder for me not to judge anything too quickly. Who knows where something might lead? I never would have guessed that place where I was pressing my face against a bathroom stall would end up being where I go to celebrate this body, this moment and this life.
How was your first class?
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I read your first time at Bikram Yoga class with a smile on my face. It made me remember my first time. My husband was on holidays and I suggested we should spend some time exercising together. I figured yoga would be slightly different for us so I looked up the local yoga studios in the phone book. Bikram Yoga sounded interesting. My husband made a phone call and was advised the next class was in 30 minutes. If we left now we could make it. We scrambled our things together and went. I knew Bikram Yoga was hot yoga, but I didn’t know HOW hot it was going to be, or that it would have helped being hydrated. Luckily, we wore shorts and T-shirts, not long pants as I’ve seen some poor people wear during their first practice. I don’t remember much after that, other than a booming voice firing non-stop instructions, telling me off not to drink water as it is only allowed between postures and definitely no water before a compression posture. I was dying of thirst. I couldn’t wait to get into savasana quick enough to take advantage of the meagre 20 seconds of life saving rest, but my body was so stiff and tired that it took me close to 10 seconds to organise all of my four limbs and lie down properly. I felt I just wanted to fall into a heap on the floor face first – stuff the “heals together, toes apart, arms along the side of the body with palms facing up”. But I did it. And somehow, I didn’t sit out any postures. I felt like I was running on auto pilot, like a robot. Our introductory pass was for ten days and I wanted value for money, so we went back everyday for the next nine days stretching out our sore muscles. It felt great. It felt cleansing. I loved it. I was addicted. My husband didn’t say much, but at least he went with me. Then he started work and I went by myself, everyday. I only took Sundays off. I even went when I didn’t feel 100%. I was still running on auto pilot. Then I fell pregnant. I received a lot of contradictory information. Some said don’t practise during your first trimester. Some said there were no problems. I practised for the first two months, then I panicked, and took a break. This was four years ago. It turned out to be a long break. Now I’m back practising two to three times a week. I don’t feel like doing more. I still hate other forms of exercise: jogging, swimming, aerobics, weight lifting, boxing, zumba, walking, pilates, other forms of yoga – you name it – I’ve done them all year in and year out and never felt any love, more like a chore. I still hate hot weather and sweat, but I love Bikram Yoga and I embrace the sweat in the yoga room.
So glad you are back! Thanks for sharing your story.
My first class was about 10 years ago, a time before there were really any studios with proper heaters! There were about 5 of us, a teacher and a few plug in heaters in a room in a leisure centre… I’m glad – not sure I’d have kept coming back if my first time had been as hot as my classes are now! I enjoyed the class but my lasting memory is leaving, looking up at a clear blue sky and feeling the urge to burst into tears at how beautiful it was..Ha, emotional release like I’d never known. I’ve been hooked ever since and miss it madly if I have too long a break from regular practice…
Oh, I LOVE that emotional release! It’s so great to hear from someone who has been practicing for so long!
OMG – great post. My very first bikram class was actually a private lesson. I feel confident saying that if I’d gone to an actual class first, that I would never have returned. The studio owner (at that time) had emailed with me a few times about class, what to expect, what to bring, etc. I could tell she was a gem right away, but meeting her really cemented that fact. Her enthusiasm and love for this yoga was unending, and that’s what got me through that first class. It was hard. I was scared. I hated my body and we were RIGHT UP AGAINST the mirrors – horrifying! She only had the heat set at about 95 (goin’ easy on me), but I was sweating bullets. I couldn’t do most of the poses due to my ample belly, but her enthusiasm and belief in me never wavered. She knew I could do this. She knew it would change my life. I promised that I would be back for class the next day.
I remember telling her that my only goal for that lesson was to not faint or vomit in the studio. I met both of those goals by waiting until I got home – I dropped my stuff and promptly threw up. I was reeling!
The next day was my first official class. It was by a brand new teacher who (bless her heart) had not yet mastered the fine art of speaking, watching, and also managing the weather. It was 112 in there!!! One of the gals (who is now the studio owner) told me after class that that was one of the hardest classes she’d been in. AMEN! Had that been my first experience, I probably would have run screaming.
There’s just something special about the Bikram Yoga community – that’s what has kept me coming back.
I totally agree. I wasn’t looking for a community when I went to Bikram – but now I don’t know what I would do without them! What a great idea to do a private for your first class.
I loved reading your first experience, and everyone else who has commented as well!
My first class was 15 years ago and I was only 12! I was at a training camp for youth sailors and on day 4 of crap weather, coach walked in and said “grab a towel and put some clothes on, we’re going to yoga.” I pulled some jeans over my swimsuit laughed and laughed picturing our army of hyper kids wrecking havoc on a pastel room with waterfalls and wooden flute music and trying not to laugh while “om-ing” our way through some ridiculous touchy feely hippy activity.
It was a tiny studio, with some space heaters. But I don’t remember the heat at all. I just remember watching those boys, (who were sooooo good at everything we did in training camp), huff and struggle, grunt and sweat, while I bent and twisted with the natural ease of 12 year old little girl body. The euphoria of “beating” them was overwhelming, and I was addicted for life.
I will never forget watching myself beam in the mirror for 90 minutes that first class.
You were 12?!?! Wow! That’s so cool.
My first Bikram class was in 2004. I was on summer break from college and my best friend called me up and said she had run into a friend from high school and he was really into this “heated yoga”. She was going to meet him at the studio that night for a class if I wanted to check it out.
“Yes, I have been hearing about this, lets do it” I said.
My yoga experience thus far consisted of a few extremely mellow yoga classes at the gym and a home session with a Patricia Walden yoga video. I imagined relaxed stretching in a heated room. I wore sweatpants.
When my friend and I got to the studio we were greeted by an extremely peppy woman. She was about 5 feet tall, extremely fit, very tan, with dreadlocks hanging down past her jungle print hot pants. She was popular. People were packing in to the room.
I really had no idea what I was in for. As soon as I stepped into the room I was deeply regretting my outfit choice. It seemed like every one in there was super prepared, they all had skimpy spandex outfits on and started doing this crazy darth vader breathing in unison. “This is insane” I thought to myself.
The teacher announced from the back of the room during triangle “Weather report! Its 107 degrees back here!”
I had to leave the room right after that. I was pretty sure I was going to vomit. Thankfully I didn’t. When I came back in I was really happy to find everyone laying on the floor. Although there were a few moments where I was laying there thinking “I must be dead because I am in hell” the floor was a million times better than the standing series.
The class was super hard, not at all what I was expecting, and made me feel so awful when I was in there but I was really amazed by how fantastic I felt after that class. It felt like the euphoria you feel from a really intense run, combined with the relaxation of a massage or going to a sauna.
I couldn’t convince my friend to go back right away but I went later that week. I went to a day time class and there were only about 10 people there. The teacher was much more laid back, it felt cooler, I felt more prepared. I was totally hooked.
It sounds like you were just about as unprepared as I was! So glad you stuck it out. 🙂
I took my first class in 2008 at the request of my sweetie. Like Chelsea above, a Patricia Walden DVD was my only taste of yoga. I weighed 278 lbs. and proceeded to flop around like a fish for about 65 minutes before leaving the room. I’m the clod in T-shirt and shorts surrounded by all these fit men and women. I was hot, self conscious, and embarrassed. I did very little right — and felt horrible. The thing was, as I sat huffing and puffing in the lobby, I felt different. I actually felt better! I ended up going four nights in a row, and on the fourth night I made it all the way through the class. Been in love with yoga ever since.
Fantastic! I think so many people think they need to be in “perfect shape” (whatever that means) before they step into a yoga studio. So glad you had the courage to go back — keep up the great work!!
A bit late to the party, but I thought I’d chime in too.
My first Bikram class was about 9 years ago. I remember it vividly – it was a Tuesday night class at 8pm at Bikram City in London, and the teacher was a young lady called Rachel. Because there was a problem with the tube that night, I arrived quite late and by the time I got into the hot room, the only spot left was at the far back right hand side of the room – the hottest corner, as it turned out. I’d already been practicing ‘power’ yoga (astanga based hatha with lots of sun salutations) for over a year by that time, but the Bikram class was something else entirely. I sat out a lot of postures. Some postures we unexpectedly almost impossible – even the setup for standing head to knee was incredibly difficult and my shoulders screamed at me when I stood up again, and I couldn’t even get my hands into the correct position for locust. At one point Rachel was doing the rounds of the class and walked past me and asked ‘are you ok?’ as I was sitting on my towel melting gently, somewhere around the middle of the floor series. I waved my hand as if to fan myself. Rachel’s response: “Yes, I know: it’s hot!” completely deadpan… and walked on.
I don’t remember much that night after class, but I must have felt it was worth it because the following night I went back again for the 7pm class with another lady called Emma. Pretty soon I’d worked up to power yoga Monday, Bikram Tuesday, hatha Wednesday, Bikram Thursday and power yoga Friday, but gradually the other stuff faded away and I was doing more and more Bikram. It changed my life, bulletproofed my chronic bad back, tightened the loose screws in my head and kept me sane for about 5 years when I worked in London during the week and had to stay away from home all that time. Without it I think I’d have gone completely bonkers!